Posted by Mindy1718 on 2014/10/14 under Uncategorized I left high school and now I’m an adult where responsibilities are haunting me every day of my life… Ugh! I hate the fact that being able to have to pay debts that aren’t mine. I’m real angry at so many things! I guess the fact that life is now going slowly past my eye and soon I feel like it’s just a life that no one will see again. I don’t believe in some God because obviously, where is that “God” that people talk about so much? I don’t see the value in it really but I have a choice whether or not to believe of course! I do wish that people would just go away for a while and leave me be! I need to be alone DAMMIT! Why the hell do people have to know everything too! It’s none of your business where I go. I have options to where I want to go at my own damn age. I know that you need me but does it occur that I need to rest from the world? I don’t even know… I don’t want to be an adult then again, I do. I love having more freedom then again, my friends are everywhere. Living in a boarding school was fun until I guess it didn’t last any more, I have too much time to see the things that I need to do rather than do them I guess? Damn, I’m even complaining so much like a damn child that wants a toy. “Why can’t I have that?” “Why are you so mean?” Some people could be big ass b****es too! Why do I have to answer you if you already know my own answer? I want to leave but then again I don’t. I don’t know if I can survive without that person either. I keep telling myself that I would forget him but he still remains in my heart no matter what. I loved him for five years and apparently its real hard to forget someone you really love. Letting go I know isn’t easy but where has that person went? I guess the mystery of him still goes on with my heart that doesn’t want to let go. Now that I think about it, all I talk about is myself and the recent days seem to be lonely… I want to be with friends, I want to be entertained without boredom, to feel the beach again, to laugh a lot, to have someone to actually talk to, and to have someone talk to me back. To feel special is what I’m looking for I guess? Guessing is what I like to do more often but I wish to not guess but know! Knowing is a lot better than guessing. Having so many dreams in my life but never one of them came true pisses me off every time I think of it! Well, I guess I’ll try to stop guessing and start knowing more things…